36~

35

i remember the morning i was turning 35

my dad called and wished me well then ask how old are you going to be again

i said 35...he said god your getting old

i replied i know...i officially hit the half way point to 40

and as quick as can be he replied more like the half way point to 70

i replied thanks dad...way to really put my life in perspective

 

35 held a tumultuous amount of life changing moments

all packed into the mere 365 day that were

i think for the next 35 years now life will just be calm

wishful thinking right?!?

 

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i moved slowly within my final days of 35

i  pondered things i wanted to do to mark the final day

but decided otherwise

35 had i think enough momentous moments for me

so i settled for the nothing

 

36

is here

 

it was celebrated

QUIETLY CALMLY PEACEFULLY JOYFULLY

these past few weeks i have been

studying the art of doing nothing

and i think i can officially graduate with a masters degree

 

it felt nice

 

lately i have been thinking about

my life

where i want to be

what i want to do

and am looking forward to seeing where the days will lead

 

36

 

* finish writing one of my books

* print one my books

* sell one of my books

* continuing exploring new ways  of selling my photography

* become apart of a farmers market

* have a booth is some sort of fair~bizarre~flea market frenzy

* read my camera book

{i have had my  dream camera for almost two years now...its a lofty challenge for me...it is huge and filled with sssoooo much information...i can only sit for so long then i want to play with my camera...and alas the book gets put away for great lengths of time}

* buy the perfect shade of red lipstick

{i know this is silly but i am quite plain and simple...me and my rose lip balm go hand in hand...i realized it had been 18 years since i wore red lipstick...it was the first and the last and it was NOT BY CHOICE...i was summed to do such by my loving sister} even if i wear it just once throughout the rest of my life...i would like to attempt to try...though it is not to say i will leave my home...lol!}

* see montana

{i have had a fascination with montana ever since i saw a river runs through it years ago...my grandpa says why don't you just rent the movie again...so yes we are planning a road trip}

* zip line

* glass fusing

* pottery lessons

{in high school i never gave it a fair shot...i tried the wheel two times and decided it was not for me...i think it was because i really did not care at the time...it was a fun easy class i took to pass the time by}

* meet more of you wonderful people face to face

{was one of my greatest memories this year was being able to spend time with barry and fiona...two whom i had met through the land of blogs}

* camping...camping...camping

{as most of you know this is nothing new...just a normal for us...but our truck has been being rebuilt for the past year and well there has not been ONE single adventure since last february...so making it a priority to help my love with whatever i can in order to get our truck complete}

*  cold process soap 

{this scares me...i am not too good with chemicals...i have this fear i will blow something up...but i want to do this and my sister said she would assist and be my mad scientist}

* canning

{ i have done this sparingly...but this year i will be making good use of every waking thriving fruit and vegetable that comes to be}

*  begin teaching one wee little one how to drive

{frightening right...and i know he is not so little...but he's our baby...so little he will always be! i want to be apart of this process and memory}

* help one little become sponsored on his scooter

{sometimes we forget to really pay attention to the desire and strengths of our children...i want to help him achieve this dream...though he is doing amazingly well thus far on his own}

*  learn to play the violin

* double the amount we saved in 2013

* volunteer 

* continue eliminating useless consumed items in our house

* finish our floors 

{only have the living room and kitchen left}

* plant fruit trees

{thinking pears}

* pursue wine making with my love

* make kombucha

{failed at our first attempt}

* pondering joining the belly dancing competing & traveling group

{was asked last spring to join the competing group but had to decline do to our circumstances that arose}

* continue exploring life alone 

* master driving a stick shift 

(this is a work in progress that is filled with much laughter}

*  learn how to do stand up paddle boarding 

* learn a new language

* make salted caramels

* take an aroma therapy class

* sew more

* master knitting in the round

{i can knit perfectly well on two straight stick but still challenging to get my first round on circular needles to look uniform}

* ENJOY EACH AND EVERY SINGLE DAY WHETHER I AM DOING SOMETHING OR NOTHING

 

quite a mouthful right

wondering which one will i work on first

 

i may have used this quote before but its a good one all the same

 

Abraham Lincoln Once Said:

"In the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."

 

fourteen years~

i am understanding the age

lifes grand game of tug of war

the gentle pulling away

the unwanted letting of go

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as much as i long to keep him safely tucked by my side...his wings are spreading day by day...flapping a little further from the nest we've created...boundaries being pushed...needs being extended a little farther by day

sigh...the years have passed on by far faster than i have wished

 

Forgiving

Optimistic

Unique

Radiant

Truthful

Encouraging

Enriching

Noble

 

Once more, the page turns, another chapter has begun

 

happiest of happy birthdays to our wee oldest one

 

13...twenty three and many more~

tumultuous:

  

Making a loud, confused noise; uproarious:

 

Excited, confused, or disorderly

 

      TUMULTUOUS
       

    clearly.sums.up.our.days.of.June

       
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    13...twenty~three

     

    one fathers birthday celebrated

    our anniversary came once more

    a holiday together away

    two troublesome phone calls

    one sisters life takes an unexpected turn

    one fathers life joins her possible path

    savoring time

    yet feeling lost within the minutes passing by

    numb

    pushing through

    letting go

    putting lifes troubles in the hands of the universe

    hanging onto hope

     

     

    Someone once said: 

     "So don't worry about tomorrow, For tomorrow will bring its own worries. Todays trouble is enough for today."

     

     

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    13...twenty~four

     

    a multitude of doctors appointment

    another dental disaster

    biopsies for one

    more testing for thee other

    optimism

    melt down

    flurry of falling outs

    comfort in the words of a sister so so far away

    time ticking

    exhaustion setting

    running away

    stumbling upon long lost hidden treasures

    riding the waves of life

     

     

    Someone once said:

    "I may not be the strongest, I may not be the fastest, but i'll be damned if i am not trying my hardest." 

     

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    13...twenty~five

     

    appointments keep coming

    hearing haunting news

    confirmation of cancer for one

    yet more tests to be ran for another

    sinking

    yet trying to swim back to the top

    encouragement

    support

    clearing the way through the blur of my days

    sickness swirling

    rainy days keep coming

    mugginess that leads to an unpleasant stickiness

    down on my knees

     

    Victor Hugo once said:

    "Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, Whatever be the attitude of the body, The soul is on its knees." 

    eight years~

    so   big

    yet still so small

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    last night

    for a moment

    just for a moment

    he forgot how big he was  

     

    i started humming  

    and he asked  

    "mama will you sing the words" 

     

      he allowed me to sing to him just like i had for so many years

     

    for a moment

    just for a moment

    i felt i had my baby back

     

     

    Enthusiastic

    Inspiring

    Genuine

    Humerous

    Tender

     

    happiest of happy birthdays to our wee littlest

    one hell of a man~

    there are not many

    that i look up to in this world

    a handful to say the least

    but there is one who sticks out indeed

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    we have had our moments through the years

    the joyous relationship of a father and daughter

    the ebb and flow cycles of growing each year

    the good with the bad

    the happy with the sad

    fortunate am i to have such a soul

    to carry me through

    and continually guide me

    throughout my day to day

    fortunate for we

    to have such a father

    grandfather

    brother...uncle...husband...and more

    he is a light in this world that shines ever so bright

    a gift to each

    there is a certain manner about him

    that touches the hearts of all who's near

    wishing you the happiest of happy birthdays this year

    you are one hell of a father

    and

    one hell of a man

    Clarence B. Kelland once said:

    "My Father Didn't Tell Me How To Live; He Lived, And Let Me Watch Him Do It."

    looking back through 34...

    there will never be another year like so

    it was

    filled with adventure

    an

     an abundance of new

    so many "first" time things came to be

    THERE WAS

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    snowboarding moments

    see here...it had been 16 years since i stepped on a board

    due to my first time going down the mountain at the ripe age of 18...no one told me how to stop...they yelled up at me just fall back...so fall back i did...and ended up with a trip to the doc...end result...one cracked tailbone 

    our oldest said one day as i was ending 33

    "why mama...why don't you try again"

    so try i did

    and i do have to say

    i am no longer afraid

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    a gift from my love and littles

    with him saying

    "now you can live your dream"

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    six girls {so we thought} came home 

    to add to our mix

    our first time raising babies

    here LIBRA just a mere 3 days old

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    it only took a few short weeks to discover that "she" was really a "he"

    LIBRA now 10 months old

    not only raising chickens but alas a rooster too

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     my first etsy sale

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    our bedroom went under construction

    i helped my love and littles {and learned how to} build a bigger closet in our room and white wash our floors

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    we celebrated my father turning 70

    with the presence of

    our family from so so far away

    {it was a first for many of them coming out to washington}

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    and per our fathers request

    his ever loving 70th birthday wish

    we

    our father, my sisters, brother, nephew and i

    went sky~diving

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    my love and i

    became parents of a teenager

    our oldest little {who is not so little anymore} turned 13

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    i danced

    in my first belly dancing recitals

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    i

    married

    a very sweet couple

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    my love and i

    went on a morning date

    while

    our oldest babysat for the first time

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    my sister showed us

    a blueberry wonderland

    we spent many of our summer days picking away

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    we stumbled upon a vw bus

    and

    took her on her

    maiden voyage to orcas island

    for a family trip

    {it had been over 15 years since we all went up as a family and was also a first for many}

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    my sister and i flew to chicago

    {thank you to two very dear people who made it possible}

    and

    we embarked on a traveling adventure

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    to visit her campus and i was blessed to be able to show my support

    as she graduated

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    an

    unexpected road trip

    with loved ones

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    and as a family we witnessed 

    a miracle

    here's to the gift of life

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    i launched my website

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    my dream was

    ...just...one...

    if i sold just one of my prints

    well many made my dreams come true these past few months

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    34

    may be hard to beat

    there were so many wonderful life moments that came to be

    my hope for

    the days of

    35

    tomorrow is

    that

    i

    can and will

    continue to indulge

    in the sweetness of life