words have been written~
have i finished
NOPE
am i bothered by such
NOPE
what i am realizing
i have way more to write than originally thought
where i am
STILL WRITING
where will i be
one. day. finished
i have not fallen from the face of the earth again
just engulfed in writing words
and the thoughts seem to come quicker than i can type
my attention span is short
as my mind in running on overdrive
Ray Bradbury said:
"you fail only if you stop writing"
i think this sums my thoughts up perfectly about not finishing on the deadline i set for myself...see had i not set a deadline...i probably would never have sat down and started to write "this" book i am writing
a soft dewy glow~
busily going about our ways
quite often these days
i am losing track of time
on the eve of her night
for what ever reason
i turned towards the dark
as if her energy was calling me near
i stepped out
to be graced with a fleeting minute or two of silence
before the clouds blanketed her
a soft dewy glow she was
lingering in the deep black sky
februarys snow moon
should be noted as a rain moon for us
there has been no sightings of snow
just showers through the night
heavy cloud covers kept me from her
when she rose to her fullest
thankful.though.for.the.moment.i.had
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Once Said:
"nothing that is can pause or stay...the moon will wax...the moon will wane...the mist and clouds will turn to rain...the rain to mist and clouds again...tomorrow be today."
some kind of love~
maybe because it is in my nature
maybe because i am a true pisces through and through
whatever the reason is to say
i am a hopeless romantic
and believe in some kind of love
~all prints are available in my redbubble shop~
who...what...when...why...where~
a quick hello before the month comes to an end
WHO: me
WHAT: writing a book
WHEN: now
WHY: because every persons story should be heard
WHERE: at home
PROMISE TO BE BACK SHORTLY
Maya Angelo Once Said:
"There is no greater agony
than bearing an untold story inside you"
change...
januarys card speaks of
change..a journey ending...a closing....completion...a homeward stretch...a finishing of sorts
...of new beginnings...of chance...of confidence...
its as if the universe is encouraging me...chanting to me...giving me the little extra nudges that need be...it is in accepting and knowing that change will not come if i am not the one creating the change...steering the wheel...driving the force...it is in this where i find myself lost
the cards they speak...they foretell
but it is up to me to LIGHT my way
{fingers crossed}
Lao Tzu once said:
"If you do not change direction...You may end up where your heading"
earthen strings...
earthen strings...the waxing and waning of a winters day...as mother nature set her tone...she gently guides us through the longingly cold and dampening hours...deep cobalt darkening skies are present when we rise in the morn and set in the night...it is within this gift of hers...time...to pull inward and find our own light...the faint colors of the grasses pale green...is her reminder to each...though we may not be thriving...we are continuing to grow...the cycle never seizes...the wheel has yet to change...it is in these days that i crochet...it is the silence...the slowness...the warmth from layers...the cups of endless tea...the flickering flames of firelight...the candles that glow among a dim lit room...it is in the comfort of knowing that all will change...it is in knowing that a season will never last forever...it is having an appreciation for such...that puts me at ease... i fully surrender to the days of winter as i continue to weave my earthen strings
she hid in the night...
for most of the darkening hours that were
she hid silently behind a clouded night sky
when she finally appeared
her unto herself
an old moon in a bright new year
she was masked by the trees
with just a hint of golden light
faint as her casting
it was enough to catch my eye
and silence me so
chasing snow...
it called for 6-10 inches of snow in the mountains
all in a matter of hours
then the rain would reside
i woke my love
and shared how i wanted to see our river in white
i wanted to see the snow
i wanted to touch the snow
i wanted to smell the snow
i wanted to hear the snow
i.just.wanted.to be.in.the.snow
trying as hard as i might
attempting to entice my love and our littles
of a little snow white
i shared how this would be the opportune time
to take our truck for a little test run
it made it to the sun shining mountains with a few minor glitches
but since its rebuild it hasn't set foot on white
after hours of hymn ha~ing through the day
my love sat up and said lets go
i sprang from my seat and scurried away
an hour and a half up and same coming down
my love said it will be a short run
the clock spoke of one thirty one
and the rain was to set with high flailing winds between five and six
nearly minutes after the clock struck two
we were on the road
chasing the snow
as we headed out of town
it was a dark and dreary mess
but once we hit the road of the mountainside
my heart skipped a beat
as it became a wintery wonderland
well sometimes good feelings die hard and quick
just about half way up
it became apparent that our little road trip
was coming to a screeching white halt
there was no place to go
except off the next exit
if ever we wanted to make it home before morn
inevitably we made the turn
my love paused for a moment
and decided to sneak onto a road less traveled
this man he knows me well
he knows my mind
he knows my heart
he knew there was a camera at hand
so we were granted with a quick little stroll
and a bit of a nature call
on a side note if you please...when looking at our truck ...you will notice a lovely blueish purple tint
though great for blocking the sun...it makes for a bit of a struggle to photograph when you are inside
hence why you will see a hint of blue at times
with darkness slowly on the rise
and the winds and rain kicking in
it was our time
to hit the main road
and make our way home
it might not of been what i was i hoping for
there were no rivers of white raging so
just mile upon mile of blanketed trees
but seeing the land all covered in white
was plenty for me
Orison Swett Narden once said:
"Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities...seize common occasions and make them great."
light...
i have had quite a few conversations
which lead back to
"do...ing"
stop thinking...just do
i have been told this many of times before
i over think...over analyze...and then execute non
i get lost in my mind more often then not
last year i enjoyed the idea of not picking a word
but allowing my word to come to me in a different manner
and so i drifted towards the oracle cards once more
to chose my one little word for 2015
so many enticing energizing meanings wrapped within this word
LIGHT
may it be my beacon...my guide...my blaze for 2015
12 + 3...
a ritual
tis how i welcome a new calendar year
cards laid before me
waiting to expose what may be on the rise
the chances and changes to be coming my way
my intention is always that of 12
but the openness is there for others to present themselves
3 more cards came to be
these i am holding as my life cards to reflect upon for the year
a starting middle and ending
2015
is full of
growth of change of exploration of prosperity of happiness
of roots of motherhood and of finding my way
it is a first in many years that the days are to unfold in abundantly blessed ways
the last few years have spoken of hardship trials tribulations and proved very much so
to the unknown and where it will lead
Julien Smith said:
"Going to the unknown is how you expand what is known"
awaken...
the final hours are here
another year is coming to a close
since i woke this morning...the minutes have been rapidly diminishing coinciding with the same fleeting emotions i carried throughout 2014
it has felt like one of the longest yet quickest of years thus far
today...i paused...many times actually...reflecting upon the days that were and curiously wondering what the days of new will become
i have thought a great deal about my little word
{i had to go back to last January as i could not quite remember how i stumbled upon my word for the year} and as i read...my post...my word unexpectedly chosen
AWAKEN
took on a whole new meaning than what i originally thought or per say planned it to mean
i was anxious on many accounts to get back to how we once were...to continue with a certain momentum that i had always attained...i wanted to dive head first...submerging and pushing myself in and with new endeavors...
i had grand plans
non.of.which.came.to.be
AWAKEN
came to me in a realization that things will never be as they were...life changes...people change...through the hard ships of living...the rigorous rowing and treading through stormy waters...through the sweet sailing days...growth is occurring...we are constantly evolving even if we can not see it on the forefront
AWAKEN
came to me is recognizing that what once was and what is now...was and is apart of my story...there has yet to be discovered a way to turn back the clocks of time...so instead of recreating and striving for the past...i could and can only move forward creating my now
AWAKEN
came to me when looking back...in simple subtle ways...nurturing ways...calming ways
AWAKEN
was not just about me but those that are in my life...the need to be present...nothing more...nothing less...just wholeheartedly present in their day to day
AWAKEN
was about realizing the need for myself to be...to simmering in my thoughts...to withdraw into my own silence...for acknowledging the truth behind what had all been
AWAKEN
it may not have been a boisterous year
but it was a year
a year in which
AWAKEN
slowly crept in and became a touchstone in my spirit and soul
Buddha once said:
"there is only one time when it is essential to awaken...the time is now"
may 2015
be a blessed one
for each of you
in between~
somewhere in between here and there
it feels as if
we have done everything and nothing all the same
mainly...purely...simply
we have just been living life each day
Someone Once Said:
"family...like branches on a tree...we all grow in different directions...yet our roots remain as one"
the sweetest softest fragile hints of spring~
a tiny fragment
connecting us to a past memory
a present thought
a symbolic piece of life
awakening our spirits
from the dormant ways of once was
warmth has slowly returned
light continually brinking upon the horizon earlier and earlier by each morning hour
dusk easing into night lingering as they mingle momentarily in the golden moonlit hour
rain falls
saturating the earth
grounding the roots of life that are waiting to emerge
we step a little lighter
smile a little longer
as we are present with the ever changing ways of springs season at hand
in darkness there is light~
the other day my love and i were talking
me: i think i stumbled upon one of my most favorite pictures i have taken
{to me...it is stunning...but its purely my own thought and opinion and i guess you could say i can be kind of partial to pictures i have taken}
my love: you should take more pictures of people
me: i do...of our family and you
my love: no of other people
me: why...i don't want to take random pictures of people
my love: why not
me: because i do not want to
my love: well couldn't you just do it sometimes
{as he and i were talking i was pulling up the picture to show him}
me: nope...look
{he looks at the picture above}
my love: wow...you need to keep taking pictures of trees
{insert laughing}
me: phew...glad we got that one figured out
I say:
"Living life is not about how someone else wants you to live...It's about living your life how you want to live."
36~
35
i remember the morning i was turning 35
my dad called and wished me well then ask how old are you going to be again
i said 35...he said god your getting old
i replied i know...i officially hit the half way point to 40
and as quick as can be he replied more like the half way point to 70
i replied thanks dad...way to really put my life in perspective
35 held a tumultuous amount of life changing moments
all packed into the mere 365 day that were
i think for the next 35 years now life will just be calm
wishful thinking right?!?
i moved slowly within my final days of 35
i pondered things i wanted to do to mark the final day
but decided otherwise
35 had i think enough momentous moments for me
so i settled for the nothing
36
is here
it was celebrated
QUIETLY CALMLY PEACEFULLY JOYFULLY
these past few weeks i have been
studying the art of doing nothing
and i think i can officially graduate with a masters degree
it felt nice
lately i have been thinking about
my life
where i want to be
what i want to do
and am looking forward to seeing where the days will lead
36
* finish writing one of my books
* print one my books
* sell one of my books
* continuing exploring new ways of selling my photography
* become apart of a farmers market
* have a booth is some sort of fair~bizarre~flea market frenzy
* read my camera book
{i have had my dream camera for almost two years now...its a lofty challenge for me...it is huge and filled with sssoooo much information...i can only sit for so long then i want to play with my camera...and alas the book gets put away for great lengths of time}
* buy the perfect shade of red lipstick
{i know this is silly but i am quite plain and simple...me and my rose lip balm go hand in hand...i realized it had been 18 years since i wore red lipstick...it was the first and the last and it was NOT BY CHOICE...i was summed to do such by my loving sister} even if i wear it just once throughout the rest of my life...i would like to attempt to try...though it is not to say i will leave my home...lol!}
* see montana
{i have had a fascination with montana ever since i saw a river runs through it years ago...my grandpa says why don't you just rent the movie again...so yes we are planning a road trip}
* zip line
* glass fusing
* pottery lessons
{in high school i never gave it a fair shot...i tried the wheel two times and decided it was not for me...i think it was because i really did not care at the time...it was a fun easy class i took to pass the time by}
* meet more of you wonderful people face to face
{was one of my greatest memories this year was being able to spend time with barry and fiona...two whom i had met through the land of blogs}
* camping...camping...camping
{as most of you know this is nothing new...just a normal for us...but our truck has been being rebuilt for the past year and well there has not been ONE single adventure since last february...so making it a priority to help my love with whatever i can in order to get our truck complete}
* cold process soap
{this scares me...i am not too good with chemicals...i have this fear i will blow something up...but i want to do this and my sister said she would assist and be my mad scientist}
* canning
{ i have done this sparingly...but this year i will be making good use of every waking thriving fruit and vegetable that comes to be}
* begin teaching one wee little one how to drive
{frightening right...and i know he is not so little...but he's our baby...so little he will always be! i want to be apart of this process and memory}
* help one little become sponsored on his scooter
{sometimes we forget to really pay attention to the desire and strengths of our children...i want to help him achieve this dream...though he is doing amazingly well thus far on his own}
* learn to play the violin
* double the amount we saved in 2013
* volunteer
* continue eliminating useless consumed items in our house
* finish our floors
{only have the living room and kitchen left}
* plant fruit trees
{thinking pears}
* pursue wine making with my love
* make kombucha
{failed at our first attempt}
* pondering joining the belly dancing competing & traveling group
{was asked last spring to join the competing group but had to decline do to our circumstances that arose}
* continue exploring life alone
* master driving a stick shift
(this is a work in progress that is filled with much laughter}
* learn how to do stand up paddle boarding
* learn a new language
* make salted caramels
* take an aroma therapy class
* sew more
* master knitting in the round
{i can knit perfectly well on two straight stick but still challenging to get my first round on circular needles to look uniform}
* ENJOY EACH AND EVERY SINGLE DAY WHETHER I AM DOING SOMETHING OR NOTHING
quite a mouthful right
wondering which one will i work on first
i may have used this quote before but its a good one all the same
Abraham Lincoln Once Said:
"In the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."
clearing the fog~
my shadowy fog
that lingered for so long
is disappearing
life is feeling lighter
the weight of the world no longer sitting on my shoulders
i am dancing through my days slowly
swaying to and from
there are no swift steps to stumble upon
just rocking to and from
breathing ever so deeply
and enjoying every moment of such
doing nothing...absolutely nothing
ok...that's a lie...there is always much to do but once more we are falling into our own rhythm...not sure how many more times i can type such but this time it feels good...it feels right...it feels like it is going to last
Maya Angelo Once Said:
"Everything in the Universe has a rhythm, Everything dances."
unspoken~
because sometimes
just sometimes
you need not say a thing
